Wednesday, 9 December 2015

On Christmas Eve

One Christmas eve it was past 12 PM a little girl named Olivia could not go to sleep so her mom lily came to Olivia's bedroom and said ‘ Olivia and you should be sleeping by now’ and Olivia said back to her mom ‘ but I am not tired’ OK Olivia mom said ‘ you can stay awake for 15 more minutes but I am going to sleep right now OK set Olivia in 15 minutes I will go to sleep then Olivia's mom went to her bedroom and went to sleep then 10 minutes later Olivia Heard a thump,down the chimney he came then Olivia saw Santa!!!!!!
                       The end!

2 comments:

  1. Harmella, I loved your story! You had perfect spelling and it was really fun to read! Maybe to make your story longer, you could talk about what happened after she saw Santa, or add more detail at the beginning of the story! The story reminded me of when I stay up late and my mom is trying to get me to go to bed but I ask to stay up for just a little bit longer. Do you ever beg your parents to let you stay up late? Your story was really good! From, Kyra

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  2. Hi Harmella I really liked reading your story I thought it was very interesting why did you talk about someone else its not a bad thing i'm just wondering what I think you could impove on is try to add a little more detail on your ending how did she see santa what did he say when Olivia saw him also why did the mom tell Olivia she can stay up other then that it was great hope you read this other wise I wrote it for nothing

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