Tuesday, 6 October 2015

AS THE FLSHING LIGHTS CAME TOWARDS ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      As The Flashing Lights Came Towards Me!
AS THE FLASHING LIGHTS CAME TOWARDS ME
THE LIGHT BULB FELL ONTO  THE FLOOR IN THE
BASEMENT. THE BASEMENT IS MY FAVORITE SPOT TO DANCE BUT SINCE MY DAD DROPPED IT I CAN NO LONGER SEE ANYTHING WHICH MAKES IT VERY HARD TO DANCE AND MOVE AROUND EVERYWHERE. I WAS LUCKY ENOUGH THAT MY DAD, BOB McDONALD, WENT TO THE STORE  TO BUY A NEW ONE. WHILE HE WAS GONE MY MOM  ASKED ME TO HELP HER MAKE DINNER AND IT WAS VERY DELICIOUS! FINALLY MY DAD GOT HOME AND I WAS ABLE TO ENJOY DANCING UNDER THE FLASHING LIGHT. 

                                                       THE END!
                       

6 comments:

  1. The yellow font is too tough to read. Can you please change the colour so I can read the whole paragraph.

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  2. hi Harmella I liked the colors but it was totally of topic you didn't evan stay in the moment it reminded me about how I love to dance! you also you spealed flashing rong

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  4. Hi Harmella! I liked all the different descriptive words. It really made me visualize where you were, great job. Maybe next time don't make everything capital and different colors
    Also try to stay in the moment a little bit more (what you were smelling,thinking,and feeling).Did your story really happen in real life? If it did that would be really cool! good job :)

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